Telling the Truth

Objective
Help family members understand the importance of being completely truthful

Suggested Hymn and Song
"Oh Say, What Is Truth?" Hymns, no. 272
"Teach Me to Walk in the Light" Children's Songbook, no. 177

Suggestions for the Family
Tell family members that you are going to discuss the unfortunate consequences of bearing false witness and the good that comes from telling the truth.

Have someone read Exodus 20:1: "Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor"

Ask the following questions:

1. What does bearing false witness against a neighbor mean? (Telling something about someone that is false.)

2. Who is our neighbor? (All people are our neighbors, including members of our family.)

Following are some stories about people who bore false witness. Each of the headings suggests a possible motive that the person might have had for bearing false witness. As the stories are read, ask whether the motives are valid. Use only those that apply to your family. You may want to use your own examples, but be sure not to embarrass family members.

Point out that if we break this commandment, we suffer consequences. The stories will also identify some of the more immediate and obvious consequences.

After relating each of these stories, discuss the negative consequences resulting from bearing false witness. Also, discuss the positive consequences that could have resulted if the person had told the truh or what might happen if he were to rectify the mistake. Mention the consequences only if the ideas are not brought out in the discussion.

Shifting Responsibility

In one of his school classes, George failed to turn in several assignments. When he received a poor grade, he complained to his parents and friends that his teacher was not only unfair but also incompetent.

Because he bore false witness, George's parents and friends might erroneously believe that he has an incompentent teacher. This would be a real injustice to the teacher. George has also placed a blemish on his own character; furthermore, his action may lead to additional kinds of irresponsibility, defeat, and unhappiness.

Had he told the truth, he would have strengthened his own character by being a responsible person. He would also have had a clear conscience. Though he cannot bring back the words, he can still partly gain these blessings by telling his parents and friends that he made a mistake and confess that he, not the teacher, was at fault.

Avoiding Punishment

Ellen was dressed for Primary. She saw Mary Lou outside and went out to play with her. While they were playing in a puddle of water, Ellen fell down. With dripping clothes, she ran into the house crying and told her mother than Mary Lou had pushed her down.

Because she bore false witness, Ellen may not only get punished for playing in the water, but may get greater punishment when her mother finds out that she was not telling the truth. It is also very unfortunate that Mary Lou is being blamed for something she did not do. Heavenly Father would not be pleased.

Had she told the truth, Ellen would have felt better inside, and Heavenly Father would have been pleased. Mother also would have considered her truthfulness to be much more important than the condition of her clothes.

Avoiding Conflict

Mary asked her husband, Frank, to be on time for dinner because she had to go to a meeting. Frank became preoccupied with his work at the store and did not notice the time. When he came home a half hour late, he said, "You remember Mr. Dewey? Well, he came just as I was leaving. He is so inconsiderate. He dashed in to buy something just as I was ready to leave."

Because he bore false witness, Frank may come to find that in time lying had become a habitual method for covering up his own neglect. Dishonesty may also lead to serious consequences in a marriage relationship. Falsely accusing Mr. Dewey of being inconsiderate is certain unfair to Mr. Dewey.

Had he told the truth, his humbble and apologetic, true excuse woud likely have been accepted better than the false one. He also would reinforce his respect for himself and his wife. He should not have involved the reputation of Mr. Dewey. He could stll tell his wife the truth. This would make him feel better and strengthen their relationship.

Jumping to Conclusions

One day when Danny was coming home from school, he saw the sheriff's car in front of Mrs. Erwin's house. Then he saw Mrs. Erwin and the sherif come out of the house. Danny ran down the street as fast as he could to tell his friends that the sheriff took Mrs. Erwin to jail. Later, Danny learned that Mrs. Erwin was a district chairman for a charity drive and that the sheriff was escorting her as she took money to the bank.

Because Danny bore false witness, Mrs. Erwin's reputation was at stake, and a good deal of damage could result. Unless it is corrected, it may hurt both Danny and Mrs. Erwin. Had he been truthful, Danny would have found out the facts before spreading the news. He can still contact his friends and tell them the truth.

Being Envious or Jealous

In school, John always got good grades in math. He had ability, and he worked hard. One day, John worked a new and particularly difficult problem on the chalkboard. When he had finished it correctly, the teacher complimented him on his good work. Karl leaned over to Dave and whispered, "I could get good grades, too, if my dad worked my problems out for me the way John's does for him."

Because he bore false witness, Kar is placing a blemish on his own character, as well as influencing his friends to have questions regarding John. Karl is also discrediting the characters of John and his father. Had he told the truth, Karl would have complimented John instead of bearing false witness. He may have gained a better friend. Karl could still confess his false statement to Dave and thus strengthen his own character.

Gossiping

Mary Brown wanted to move in with some LDS girls in an apartment closer to the city and her job. She had continued to live at home for a year after high school and had taken the bus to work each day. After she talked it over with her parents, they felt it would not only be convenient for her work but would also give her an opportunity to gain some independence. When Mrs. Jenkins next door learned that Mary had left, she told another neighbor that something must have gone wrong in the Brown family. The Browns were distressed several weeks later when a friend told them se heard that a conflict in the home over Mary's behavior had resulted in her moving out.

Because she bore false witness, Mrs. Jenkins not only had done great harm to the Brown family, but she has also damaged her own character. Had she been truthful, Mrs. Jenkins would hae said nothing and done a great service. If she felt she mst say something, the facts would have saved the Browns and other people a good deal of misunderstanding. She could still offer her apologies to the Brown family by confessing her mistake, but she can never completely undo the damage she has caused.

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Explain that we suffer negative consequences when we tell an untruth, whether or not they be immediate. When we bear false witness, our character and spiritual growth take a step backward. We often hurt or damage the character of another person and become burdened with feelings of guilt. If we repeat the offense often enough, this sense of guilt begins to die as our spirituality declines.

When we tell the truth, we receive blessings. We take a step forward in our spiritual growth, leading us toward joy and happiness.

We Will Not Bear False Witness

Suggest that family members turn the commandment of bearing false witness around as follows: "Thou shalt bear true witness." This may mean learning the facts before telling a story or taking blame for your own mistakes. Ask each family member to make a commitment to be truthful durinig the coming week.